Amy Sedaris. What is there not to love? I'm still convinced she waited on us at the
Golden Angel about 4 or 5 years ago.
Amy Sedaris interview by Eric Spitznagel, from the March 2004 issue of The Believer
Monday I'm in Love
This week's list isn't as exciting for me. We'll see what I can put together from it.
- Lounge::Tap Room
- Photograph::1000 words.
- Catacomb::Kind of like a Dogabrush. No. All too often-used escape route in European cities.
- Crucifix::There used to be a guy that walked around Chicago as Jesus that carried a mini-crucifix. I wonder where he is these days.
- Fire drill::When everyone jumps out of the car at a stoplight and changes seats.
- Tube::top. It's that time of year again.
- Dropped::Like a stone
- LTD::The car the fire drills i participated in would have happened in.
- Panther::My operating system
- Formica::My countertops.
The Cancellation of Ursa Major
Erm. As promised from earlier this week.
************
The Cancellation of Ursus Major
"Is it really that bad?"
"Yes, I'm afraid so; we were expecting a bigger turnout. The beings upstairs were quite disappointed." Peldar said with a tone in his voice that sounded as though he was already tired about this line of questioning.
Zorquon looked at the visi-screen with disbelief. "We went up against Venus in transit, for Orion's sake! Of course our numbers are down... "
"Mr Zorquon, there's no need to get defensive with me. This decision came from the beings at Galactic. They've seen the drop in your ratings for years now."
"We've done everything that Galactic has asked us. When they wanted to add some new characters, we brought in that Asteroid Belt that your marketing geniuses said were all the rage -" Zorquon's rage was becoming more and more apparent as his skin color changed from light blue to indigo.
"Yes that was unfortunate," Peldar raised his folded hands up to his face, "had we of known that the Asteroid belt was going to shower on the contest winners from the Universal Vacation Getaway Sweepstakes, we would not have broadcast that during your programming; we're still cleaning up backlash from that one."
Zorquon was weighing his options. Given the chance, he always thought that the Constellation of Ursus Major would end in supernova, not a black dwarf. Or worse yet; on Channel 5684 of digital cable.
"Mr. Peldar, I will have you know that just this very morning we received an offer from the Vulpes Network in Gemini. They've promised us a slot between the Nebula and Malcolm in the Middle. I believe that puts us up against... What... Seventh Heaven." Zorquon was playing his last bluff. Everyone at Galactic knew that Seventh Heaven tanked in the ratings, but that it was a pet project of one of the higher beings.
"Let's see if we can come to an agreement. Our Network will afford Ursa Major one last chance. We're seeing a 5 movies of the week where Ursa Major and Ursa Minor must work together to solve mysteries of the cosmos." Peldar said reading from a file folder that just materialized in front of him, "If you can't turn your numbers around in that time, then I'm afraid our partnership will be at an end."
A smile materialized on Zorquon's face, "You have a deal sir! Now we'll just need to get in touch with Ursus Minor's people...."
All the raincoats in chicago....
So, saw the Magnetic Fields. Incredibly melancholy set. I've decided that Steven Merritt is what you would get if you were to cross Mark Eitzel with David Sedaris.
Where did the week go?
Erm. I'm woefully behind on all kinds of projects. I was in Milwaukee a couple days this week for work, and that's been all sorts of stress. While I do love Chicago's fair neighbor to the north, I am getting rather tired of driving 94. Especially through the stretch of Schnitzel Haus, Cheese Castles, Brat Stops, and Adult Bookstores. Ho Hum. Kind of a dull landscape.
I've got a ton of writing to do; I'm working on a little vignette from the Unconcsious Mutterings from earlier this week. One of the Characters from another story I'm mulling over has somehow started bugging me in my subconcious mind, because I'm constantly getting barbs in the psyche to tell the story of Lucia Gardinia. Really. That's the kind of character she's shaping up to be. I imagine if she could, she'd just write the story on her own (to make sure it's told correctly), sell the film rights and write a sequel where she meets a guy, he buys her a diamond the size of the ritz, they marry, and she meddles in other people's lives Jessica Fletcher style. Really.
Many thanks to my favorite dramaturg, Erin, for thinking of me when reading
this. A story in the
New Yorker about an utterly contrarian grammarian who isn't really all that good with punctuation.
I'm working on the site a little more... I'm still not sure why all the links aren't working. But eventually I'll get those sussed out in time for a whole new design i'm sure. Anyhow, I have a mountain of laundry and dishes to do, not to mention dust bunnies to chase. I don't have a ton of time, since tonight I'll be seeing the
Magnetic Fields at the Old Town School of Folk music, located here in magical Lincoln Square.
Just another Xanax Monday
Unconcious Mutterings
- Abundance::America
- Casino::Royale
- Shell::Game
- Overpriced::Six Flags
- Cancellation::A Solar System that was put on hiatus because there weren't enough viewers.
- Eternal::It's 3AM (song from the KLF)
- Lyrics::It's 3AM, Eternal... Whoooaaa.
- Faith::based missile defense system (great bumper sticker i saw last week)
- Because::between A Cause and C Cause
- Wimp::George H.W. Bush's reputation as Vice President. Ahh the days of 1987.
So believe it or not; I do have a plan for doing these little questionaires. I've been meaning to use my responses as a writing exercise to further expound on during the week. So it's kind of a pot-luck. I'm not sure what I'll write this week, but safe to say, it might be based on one of these topics. Is it too late to change my answers?
Bicycling to Mars
Wow... What an great weekend it was.
First off; the weather was fantabulous. Not too hot. Not too cold. It was like Goldilocks just settled in Chicago and it was Just Right. That said, Jim & I piloted our velocipeds to the
Chicago Botanic Gardens (located in suburban Northrbook). There was tremendously gorgeous scenery to be had riding along the North Branch of the Chicago River, and the Green Bay trail. Though we didn't ride as far as Lake Geneva, I definitely could feel it in my legs and tuchus.
If that weren't enough, I'd initially hinted that dinner at the Himalayan restaurant in Evanston would be happening with Mom; however I got a call from Lea &
Eric to see if we wanted to go see Rocket Man at the Viaduct Theatre. Mount Everest and Mom would have to wait! The play which is inspired by stories from
Ray Bradbury's Martian Chronicles, was an interesting take on Bradbury's work. The Staging was impressive; set in the round, on a platform that looks like a rocket gantry; the costumes were right out of Plan 9 from Outer space, the lighting was especially effective, there was a freakin' 3D movie. I read a few reviews that complained of the acting and the actual story; but from my point of view, it really complimented the overall pulp feeling. I keep telling myself that I should see more theatre; and this was so incredibly accessible.
I often complain about the notion of "Broadway in Chicago" because why do we need to have this franchise define Chicago Theatre? Companies like
the House Theatre make for a vibrant local scene; given the choice of the Lion King or
Too Much Light Makes the Baby Go Blind; the neofuturists doing TMLMTBGB win every time.
So much time; so little to do
Or something like that. I'm realizing that I'm uber-behind on all the posting goodness i want to do. I still have a recap of the Ride for AIDS that I wanted to write; I've still got bits bouncing around the grey matter about Wonder Woman at the Harris Bank in the Board of Trade and The Bicycle Messenger's Union.
It's at times like this I wish I had a clone to do the drudgery of going into work; and deal with the mundaneties of changing tapes, telling people to reboot or call the helpdesk, or listen to 4 hour conference calls that say "You Matter". I usually don't like to talk about work in this space, but I do find this one situation kind of trying; Last Friday we had a whole department-wide conference call where participation was greatly encouraged (which is as close to mandatory you can get while still feeling like a progressive company). The conference lasted for 4 hours. There were people in big rooms at HQ, people dialed in from all over the world, it was a big to-do.
There were several facets of the meeting. One was a focus on a specific line of business which was admittedly probably helpful, since typically tech people are so far removed from what the company does, it's almost too easy to feel like you're working in a vacuum. But from there, it got silly. Thirty minutes were devoted to a series of managers going up to the podium, reading names, and saying "Good Job!", to their minions. It's kind of odd, because, you've got 10-15 people going up there to say these names, they're feeling rushed for time, so they say these messages of thanks with about as much conviction as oscar winners thanking the academy, and they get through the list thanking developers, product managers, project leads, and in the whole while they didn't thank any of the support organization.
It's adding a dollup of insult to a sprinkle of injury. Here I was on the phone thinking the whole exercise was kind of silly and a bit 3rd grade Mrs. Harrow's class, but on top of that, a whole chunk of a hundred or so people didn't even get a blanket mention. These are the front line people, the people who often have to be the ones mop up and respond to issues when some technology change goes wrong. Sure that's our job; but since praise was being handed out pretty widely already, it would be kind of nice to get some recognition - even as broadly as "the support teams". Enough run-on sentences. So the other portion of this call consisted of an exercise that involved people being told to sit in different chairs and analyzing how they felt about it. How were we made to feel? Like Victims? Curious? Wait and See? It was to see how people reacted to change; in a "Who Moved My Cheese"-lite kind of way. In Technology, we have to be able to adapt to change rapidly. blah blah move cheese.
I think the whole time I was pretty dumbfounded. Did I really move into the land of Dilbert? Was I a victim? Was this supposed to motivate me? Couldn't I be using this 4 hours a bit more productively? Can I just go leave the call and get a bagel? Is everyone on the phone feeling like this is silly. I suppose if I did have a clone; I couldn't bring myself to sending him in there.
Anyhow, the weekend looks nice. Great bike riding weather; am going to go to either the Chicago Botanical Gardens or Jackson Park. Then meeting mom and keke for dinner in Evanston tonight for Himalayan food. Life just doesn't get any better than that. Even if you are a victim.
This agent has resigned...
"I will not be pushed, filed, stamped, indexed, briefed, de-briefed or numbered!"
okay, so I'm making an oblique reference to the 60s british TV show
the Prisoner. Nothing all that dramatic is really happening in my life; I'm just feeling like i'm outgrowing the "agent86" thing i've got going on here. I should explain. I started out the blog as an experiment for myself. Could I keep up with journaling on a quasi-semi-regular basis? Would I have lots to write about? Would both of those items ever correspond with each other? Well, i'd deem the experiment as a marginal success so far.
I am somewhat regular with posts, and I am managing to capture some of the things that i find interesting. Do other people find them interesting? mmm... I have no idea. And as far as my experiment goes, I don't think I've really addressed that aspect yet. Ideally, what I'm trying to do here is refine my voice and get it to where i am comfortable in a larger scene. Self-indulgent? Sure. But isn't that what the blogiverse is all about?
So a Contrarian Grammarian. What the F?
When people ask
Jim "what he does" he usually responds with something along the lines of "Squirrel Tamer" or "Accordion Player" which is always fun. For a while I'd respond to the same question as a "geek" or "tech guy" which i've always found horribly dull and limiting (not to mention i get lots of "how do i" questions...). In the last year or so, I've recognized that i pay a lot of attention to grammar, and the make up of written and spoken words, and in the spirit of Professor Henry Higgins I claim grammarian as my occupation. What occupies me? Grammar. Loopy? yes. But far more provacative than IT Support really.
I do have some background in the grammar industry as well. There was that two and a half years I spent in the employ of a community college newspaper doing all sorts of things; layout, editing, sales, managing, avoiding sleep. And from time to time I get to flex my grammar muscles proofing and copy editing at work and for friends.
As far as being a contrarian, well, i chose that because it rhymes. I never disagree with anyone. ever. got it?
So, in the coming weeks and months and aeons, there will be changes to the page.
Contrarian Grammarian is live (it currently comes right back here), but that will let me give the murgatroit.org domain back to the Murgatroit family so they can put their family tree on the web. I'm sure they'll be pleased as punch about it.
Scribbling and bibbling
Free association courtesy of Unconcious Mutterings
- Colorblind:: snowblind
- Shallow:: "Oh ma gawd, becky..."
- Erotica:: Wasn't this one of Madonna's tours?
- Figment:: is to Pigment as Memento is to Pimento
- Eviction:: Clothes being dumped out of a window onto someone's front lawn
- Composed:: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
- Chill:: Lemon Chill. Great America. Hillarity when big pallets filled with it would topple "backstage"
- Girl:: Gurl
- California:: American Music Club album.
- Bond:: James Bond.
bGossiplist.com Blog :: General :: Fun Ronald Reagan Quotes
"Great Communicator" indeed.
bGossiplist.com Blog :: General :: Fun Ronald Reagan Quotes
Monday Monday
Ech. It's already taking shape as one of
those days.
- Charity:: Chicago Ride for AIDS which I helped crew for over the weekend.
- Scale:: Richter
- Jennifer Lopez:: In Living Color - Fly Girl
- Coercion:: conversion
- Meter:: Meteor
- Pressure:: gauge
- June:: Bug
- Infestation:: gnats from last year. ptew!
- Serial killer:: H.H. Holmes - The Devil in the White City
- Anguish:: English with a speech impediment
Food issues
So, most people that know me know that I do have specific food
boundaries. Not a big fan of seafood, eggs in most of their forms
(scrambled, fried, poached, boiled, et al), mushrooms (though I want to
like them). I think a lot of it boils down to texture. The sight of
mayonnaise makes me a little nauseus, and don't get me started on
shellfish; i'm sure i'm mis-quoting Drop Dead Gorgeous "Mom told me
never to eat something that lives in it's shell; you never know the
last time it was cleaned."
So, today for lunch we're having sloppy joes. (looks around) I think I
might be unamerican, because, i have never really like sloppy joes.
There. It's said. Recoil if you must. But all my life I've always
really hated sloppy joe day. At home, school, barbecues, wherever.
All the other kids seemed to go ga-ga for them. Me, i quietly tried to
slink off to some corner eating chips and ice cream; trying not to look
like the outcast that for some reason hated ambrosia.
I think my complaints are this:
Non-corporeal meat freaks me out. Well, not so much
non-corporeal. Ground beef in tacos are fine, and so is an Italian
beef (pronounced eye-talian), but something about the gloppiness of
sloppy joe meat makes me think it's on it's way to crawling off my
chinet plate.
That tangy flavor. I don't know if it's the cream of mushroom
soup or whatever other mystery ingredients that are always included,
but the flavor just gives me the creeps.
The giant crock pot that is requisite at every Church, Company, or
Mega-family picinic. They always have "country stencil" designs and an
old lady standing over it, ready to glop out a large helping of
non-corporal meat. Just typing this is sending shivers down my spine.
So there you have it. Sloppy Joes. Never liked them, and I think it's
safe to say, I probably never will. Luckily for me, while I was
walking to the bank today, I discovered the joy of Pizza from
Soprafina. mmm mmm.
Muttering/Babbling... whatever
this weeks
unconcious mutterings
- Lover:: "Lover, lover, lover come back to me" - single from Echo & the bunnymen frontman Ian McCulloch's solo album. It still sticks in my head from time to time.
- Ridiculous:: Balky Bartokomous
- Oscar:: I'd like to thank the academy...
- Tennis:: tennis anyone?
- Account Balance:: I shudder to think what it is.
- Hickey:: "A hickey from Kenickie is like a hallmark; when you care to send the very best." - Grease
- License:: revoked (what the james bond movie, Licensed to Kill, was originally to be called)
- Breathmints:: FRESHMAKER! (that one was for you, Erin)
- TexMex:: culinary travesty
- Stepmother:: Carol Brady
